Locked In My Tower
by PacoThePenguinShallAvengeMe
Summary: Prequel to 'Where's My Happy Ending' In the end, Bella chooses Jacob over Edward. Now follow her as she endures the punishment of pain, regret, and sorrow that shadow her seemingly envious and love-filled new life. *Criticism Welcome*
1. Alone With My Thoughts

**A/N: Okay! Hey people! This is the prequel for my first fanfiction 'Where's My Happy Ending?' Since it's the prequel you don't have to read WMHE? to understand it (but you'll need to after this to get the ending :D) Anyway...ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything Twilight related!**

* * *

BPOV

When you have everything you've ever dreamed of, can you even contemplate of another route? When you're so set of the path before you, on the future you've planned, can you doubt yourself when you reach the fork in the road?

I bit my lip, absentmindedly fidgeting with the heavy weight that rested on my ring finger. Edward was gone, hunting with the rest of the family. They've already been gone for two out of three days of their trip, leaving me alone-alone in this dark solitude of my room, alone to my thoughts. I took a ragged breath, pulling my knees to my chest as I leaned my head against the wall.

Why did Charlie have to bring it up? Why did he have to muddle in my business? Why did he have to shatter the perfection I was living?

_Charlie jumped as I set his plate of lasagna in front of him. His brown eyes jumped to me, before he cleared his throat and looked at him food. Why was he so nervous? This hadn't been the first time I noticed him twitching around me. Ever since Edward and I announced our engagement to him, he always looked like he had something he wanted to say, but always thought against it. But…what could he possibly have to say that would make him so nervous?_

"_Um, looks good Bells." he muttered before taking stabbing the pasta with his fork. I cautiously sat in my seat, watching him. Whatever it was, it was really wearing on his nerves. I thought about letting it go, allowing him to bring whatever it was up on his own time, but when he started taking uncharacteristically small bites, I knew I had to intervene. _

"_What's wrong?" I asked him. He paused in his movements, thinking about whether or not to avoid the question I'm sure, before he sighed. He set down his fork, running a hand across his face in resignation. When his brown eyes met mine, they held caution. What was he so hesitant about?_

"_I wanted to talk to you." he started, leaning back away from his food. I mimicked his movement, preparing myself for what he had to say. It can't be that bad, I reminded myself. _

"_About?" I egged him on as he hesitated again. His eyes flashed nervously before he sighed again. _

"_Edward." he said. I immediately stiffened and opened my mouth to reprimand him on his prejudice toward my fiancé, when he continued. "More of…I wanted to talk about your…engagement." he seemed to almost choke on the word. I did not relax my posture as my eyes narrowed into a glare. _

"_Dad, I know you're not particularly partial to Edward or our engagement, but I would think that-" he raised his hand to silence me before I could continue about him supporting my decisions. _

"_Are you sure?" he asked me. I scoffed and almost rolled my eyes at the question. _

"_Of course I'm sure! What kind of question is that? Why wouldn't I be?" Wrong question to ask, I realized almost immediately. Charlie's eyes suddenly became determined. _

"_Because of how things ended with Jacob." he answered me, looking straight into my eyes, watching for some hidden reaction to his words. I felt my heart tug slightly at the mention. _

_Jacob, my best friend, was still trapped in La Push-his props of a cast and crutch restricting him from doing anything suspicious-without having called me at all. I had asked him to call me whenever he wanted me to come down, and, even though I knew that he most likely wouldn't call after I've hurt him too many times, the sheer fact that he hadn't called hurt beyond words. _

_Charlie continued when I didn't answer. " I know how much he means to you, Bells. I see you jump up whenever the phone rings. I notice you checking all of the messages religiously, waiting for him to make contact. And, I can't help but feel like your engagement is the reason he's not calling." He had no idea. "And seeing how much this hurts you…I know you love him more than you've ever let on." Sadly, that was a fact I only recently discovered myself. _

_My mind drifted to that snowy day. _

_The threat of battle looming over our heads…fear that he would do something stupid…his warm lips against mine…his arm wrapped tightly around me…the shock when I began kissing him back…the vision of two children running happily into the forest…_

"_Have you ever even considered that Jacob may be…better for you?" Charlie asked me quietly. I shook my head, dispelling the past and glaring at the present. I stood from my seat. _

"_I'm engaged to Edward, Charlie. You don't have to like, but it's the truth." I declared before storming out of the kitchen, leaving a stunned Charlie in my wake. _

Charlie truly had impeccable timing. Edward had been gone for a few hours when Charlie voiced his thoughts, and I've been lost in my own thoughts ever since. Normally I would just brush off Charlie's preference for Jacob, but…ever since that kiss, that revelation, that…vision…I couldn't. Everything had changed. My feelings had changed, and view of everything had changed.

Before that kiss, all I had know were cool lips that spread an icy inferno throughout my veins. Now I knew that it was possible to have a passionately out-of-control wild fire course through me and I would still want more!

Before I realized that I loved Jacob, I was so certain that there was only room for _one _true never-ending love in my life. Now, I knew that there were two, and that I was filled with such love for them both that my heart felt like it was going to burst!

Before that small vision, I was fine with not having kids. I had never planned on it in the first place, so it wasn't something I would particularly miss, not like Rosalie or Esme. But…seeing those two black-haired children running happily into the forest…made my heart swell with longing.

Yet…it's more than that, that made me rethink the ring on my finger.

Seeing Charlie's concern for me, no matter how biased and prejudice he may be, made me think of how concerned he would become when I couldn't come home. In his eyes, all he would see was his barely adult daughter getting married to a man who broke her heart many times and then never coming to visit. After everything I've already put him through, could I suddenly just drop out of his life forever? After he had been there for me when everyone else turned me away, when I was at my worst, could I just leave him? And, Renee and Phil, I barely see them anymore, always afraid of bring my nightmares to them! Could I survive forever without seeing them?

Then there was Edward's extreme protectiveness. Unnecessary and overbearing most of the time, while Jake would allow me to do what I wanted within reason. If I wanted to ride on a motorcycle, he would just stand back with a first-aid kit just in case. Edward would destroy the bike the second I voiced my want, lecturing me about how incredibly dangerous and reckless it would be. Yes, I realized that Edward's protectiveness saved my life on many an occasion, but…sometimes, ever since I had experienced that free reign, it became difficult to breathe when he was like that.

And, all the things he kept from me, such as Victoria returning. Jacob would never do that, he would realize that I was strong enough to hear it, and that I _needed_ to hear it. With Edward…I'm always this weak and pathetically clumsy human who is always in a desperate need for a hero. To him, even news such as that would break me. With Jacob…we're equals. He may be stronger than me, but he still knows and takes into account the fact that I can take things normal humans can't. He doesn't shelter me because he feels me inferior.

I closed my eyes, leaning my forehead against my knees, and took a deep breath. Edward or Jacob: The question that had been haunting my mind for not only two days, I've come to acknowledge. That solid question has been torturing me for months, ever since that day in the movie theater, when Jake made it known that he had feelings for me. I was just too naïve and selfish and…ultimately blind to notice it. They saw it, Charlie saw it, hell even Angela saw it…why did it take two days alone for _me _to see?

So which was it?

Edward, the one who I've wholly committed myself to time and time again? The one who I felt I was die without? The one I risked my life for? The one who taught me how it felt to love and be loved in return? My Romeo who vowed to do anything to keep me happy, safe, and healthy?

Or Jacob, my eternal sun who helped put me back together when I was broken? The one who taught me that life goes on and that's it's okay to move with it? The one who showed me how to be free? My best friend who turned to my second love? The one who just wanted what was best for me?

I squeezed my eyes shut, pushing a few warm tears out from under my lids, and lifted my head. It was somewhat serendipitous, the warm tears now cascading down my face as the ring on my finger glittered in the new morning light. The warmth against the sparkles…was it a fair enough trade. Could I choose one over the other?

A small sob wracked through my chest as the truth rang through my thoughts. The choice was obvious now…because I had already made it. Sitting in front of a plate of lasagna, I had made my choice. I had just been sitting here, trying to find a way out of it.

I wrapped my arms tight around myself as the sobs grew.

* * *

**A/N: So, there's the first chapter! Reviews are loved, both good and bad! :D :D **


	2. For the Better

**A/N: YAY! I'm sooo happy by the response I've gotten with just the first chapter! Thank you guys soooo much! :D Anyway, here's chapter two! **

**Disclaimer: I own absolutely NOTHING but the plot! **

* * *

Time passed, as it always does, while I stayed curled into myself. Sometime during the course of the day the tears ceased their never ending gushing, the rocking eased to a halt, and the sobs quieted into small whimpers. All signs of hysteria and grief dispersed, yet I stayed with my arms frozen in a vice like grip around my knees, staring at the ring on my finger. The beautiful twentieth century heirloom that was to symbolize the beginning now seemed to be symbolizing the only thing tying me to Edward. For the second I spoke of my thought, my choice, this ring would cease to exist on my finger, and he would be gone. Forever.

A small whimper passed through my lips at the thought. It was hard to think of it, something I had worked so hard to keep strong and steadfast…ending. All of the ups and downs, the wins and losses, the battles and compromises, everything we have been through just…ending.

But, it was for the better. I would get the freedom and family I needed. I wouldn't have to leave my parents or my best friend. At first, I know he would be hurt, but, eventually he would have the chance to settle down with someone who could be the woman he has always wanted. Not a measly human like myself, but Tanya, from the Denali coven, maybe. Someone who can match him in every way: strength, beauty, immortality, etc. This is what was best for the both of us.

My thoughts circled around that same path, that it would be better for the both of us, all throughout the day. Charlie left me alone, most likely knowing why I stayed holed up inside my room. He knew, but I could hear him pacing outside of my door every now and again. His fathering instincts wanted to comfort me, wanted to tell me that everything was going to be okay, but Charlie also knew that I needed to do this on my own. I needed to think things through, make my own decision, and follow through on my own. Charlie knew that, so after pacing outside my door he would pause for a moment before turning and walking away, only to come back at a later time.

But after tonight, he wouldn't have to worry like that again. After tonight, I would be in the arms and heart of someone who not only had Charlie's approval, but someone who I _knew _would never hurt me. After tonight…everything would be as it should. I just needed to be able to hold it together until-

A quick almost inaudible _sliiiide _alerted me that my time was up.

Almost simultaneously, a pair of cold arms wrapped themselves gingerly around me, pulling me into an embrace. It was now or never, I thought as I felt his cold lips press against my hair, his wintry breath wash over my scalp. I squeezed my eyes shut and forced my mind to reject all memories that surfaced under the sensation. I couldn't face them and still hold true to be decision: not memories of that first night when he held me close…not when we were watching Romeo and Juliet…not our compromise…

I twisted myself out of his arms. I couldn't wait any longer. If I hesitated for just one more second, I wouldn't be able to do it at all. I was certain of my choice, I was certain that everyone would be happier if I did this.

Everyone except…

"Edward." the second his name slipped through my lips, my eyes began tearing up. NO! I have to stay strong. I have to stay with my decision. I have to-

Edward wrapped his arms around me, attempting to console me. He knew I was in pain…he knew me so well. But, I shouldn't be in pain. I should be completely okay with doing this…I was sure of my decision.

But I was hurting Edward. My decision was going to hurt Edward, who has always been so generous, so selfless when it came to what I wanted. I was going to hurt him, and that was why I was in pain…

Right?

My heart began beating faster, as Edward began to rock me back and forth, mumbling soothing tones into my ear. Was I really doubting myself? Was I doubting the decision I had spent hours deciding upon? I can't…But as Edward's soothing motions and velvet voice imprinted into my mind with familiarity, I knew that I had to do what I had to do. I pulled away from him, scared of his effect on me and on my decision. The tears began to drip over, and my breathing became ragged. I took a deep breath.

"I don't think I can do it." I said. The words just slipped out, confusing me so much. Can't do what? Can't hurt him? Can't let him go? Can't follow through with my decision? But if I didn't follow through with this, then what would that mean for the future? If I can't follow through with this one decision then…

"Can't do what, darling?" Edward asked, and I could hear in his voice that he was willing to do anything ease my mind. I pulled my knees to my chest and pressed my forehead to them, not allowing him to see my tears…and not allowing myself to see the pain he was in.

"Edward," I started again, but…it came out a strangled sob, which very quickly became sobs in general. Sitting on my bed, I cried into my knees. Edward didn't know what was the matter, but, still, he wrapped his arms around me, began humming my lullaby, and stroking my hair…everything that would sooth me in the past.

Instead, though, it reminded me of everything he had kept from me, everything that I was not allowed to experience because of him and his over protectiveness, everything that I had considered leaving behind just so I could be with him forever: Charlie, Renee, Phil, and chance at ever having a child…everything.

I pulled away from him roughly, and stood on the floor, looking towards him.

"This." I said, with as much power as I could muster. He stared at me, his eyes searching mine, but he wouldn't be able to find anything. I was sure of what I wanted. And he saw that. He opened his mouth once, but then shut it again, not knowing what to say. I just hugged myself, trying to stop the tears from pouring, but to no avail.

He swallowed once before asking in a strained, controlled voice, "Are you sure?" I nodded quickly. I'm sure. I'm so sure. I can't…I can't be with him now. Not now. He stood up and walked towards me. My instincts told me to step forward and wrap my arms around him, but my head was saying to step away. My heart told me to just stay where I was, not wanting to hurt him by stepping away, or confuse him by stepping forward.

He stopped right in front of me, not touching me at all. He hesitated once before nodding slightly. "Okay." So easily, he said that so easily. Right then I was nearly overdone by the pain of what I was doing.

What was I doing? What was I thinking letting Edward go when he had been nothing but good and kind to me?

But I couldn't voice my doubts, as he gently reached out and stroked my cheek before turning his back and walking-human speed-towards the window.

My mind went numb with every step he took away from me. My heart ached with every second that passed. But the numbness was overshadowed by angst and sorrow when he turned around, his hand gripping the sill of the window, and said…

"Be happy." my knees collapsed under me. 'Be happy', the last thing my hallucinatory Edward had said to me, and the last thing my real Edward will ever say to me. Sobs wracked through my body, as the almost forgotten hole in my chest opened with a vengeance. I had been expecting pain, after severing a tie as strong as the one between Edward and myself, it was almost indefinite. Yet, this amount of pain, a force so strong and unbelievably familiar that it brought me to my knees, was...nothing like what I had prepared for.

He was gone. I had pushed him away. And for some reason, that thought seemed to be what made this pain that much worse than the one I experienced when _he _had been the one to leave. But it was for the better. It had to be for the better for nothing this painful could be for nothing. I had to remember that if I was to get through this.

* * *

**A/N: Chapter 2...not sure how I feel about it. Anyway, you know what happens next...I ask for reviews, you give them to me, I post another chapter, ect. :D hehehe Reviews are loved unconditionally! :D **


	3. Visions Beginning to Form

**A/N: Guys! The response I am getting with this is just...wow! I can't thank you all enough! :D **

**Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing, except for the plot!**

* * *

BPOV

It was for the better, I thought to myself for the _nth _time in the past two hours. Two hours was all I could allow myself to grieve before I carefully brought myself to my feet and stumbled to the door. It was the middle of the night, but I had to see Jake. I had to let him know of my choice. I had to let him see that I loved him and chose him. And at the moment, it didn't matter that he didn't want to see me. It didn't matter that he had explicitly said that he needed time. It didn't matter, because it was all moot, pointless.

I quietly hurried down the stairs, thinking that Charlie had to be asleep by now, but the quiet murmur of the T.V alerted me otherwise.

"Bella?" Charlie called, shocked. His voice was accompanied by the indefinite squeak of the couch as he heaved himself upright and quickly made his way to me. Charlie's face originally showed relief, glad that I was alright and had finally come out of my room, but upon looking at mine, it changed. Shock, fear, and recognition filled his saucer-like eyes as they quickly scanned over me. I blinked and looked away from him, not wanting to see the pain that was developing on his profile. He cleared his throat. "You okay?" he asked, a hopeless tone rang through it. He knew it was an unnecessary question, but customary all the same.

I pressed my lips into a small smile of reassurance before looking up at him and nodding. "Yeah, I'm fine, Dad. But…I need to go see Jake." I explained to him. A flash of triumph flickered on his face, before he deadpanned and a small furrow creased between his eyebrows. "I know it's late," I continued before he could begin his argument, "but it's important, and shouldn't wait." How could I make Jake wait any longer thinking that I was marrying Edward and didn't love him? It would be cruel.

Charlie hesitated for a moment, thinking about whether or not he wanted his daughter parading around in the middle of the night, no matter how important it was. Whether or not I was doing what he had been hoping for, whether or not I was heading to the people he trusted most, he still had to worry about his only daughter.

How many times had he worried about that, only to find that I wasn't coming home for a while?

Charlie's sigh brought me from my thoughts. "Be careful, Bells." he said. I nodded once and smiled at him.

"Thank you, Dad." I thanked him quietly before turning and heading out into the night.

The drive to La Push went by without my noticing. I do not remember thinking anything relevant during the ride, I do not remember telling myself when to turn and when to brake; it was as if I was on autopilot, and before I knew it my bulbous truck was pulling into the curb outside of Jakes house.

I looked up at the small house. The last time I had been here, it had been flooding with people, Jacob had been cringing in pain as his bones re-healed and his heart re-broke. Billy, Jacob's father, had been so worried for his son, never thinking that out of the entire pack, it would be his boy that would be harmed. The noise of people retelling the tale and worrying had filled the Black's land. Now though, it was silent. All of the windows were dark, the house nearly invisible against the landscape around it.

They were asleep. Of course they were asleep; it was the middle of the night. But…this wasn't something that could wait. He needed to know. I moved to open my door, but stopped when I noticed that I was still wearing his ring. I hadn't been able to give it back to him before he left, and now…he was most likely long gone by now. Sighing, I gently pulled the timeless heirloom from my finger and carefully placed it in the glove department. One day, I would find him and return his mothers ring to him, I thought before opening the cab door and stepping out.

The world was quiet around me as I made my way to the front door. It was as if the entire world was waiting with baited breath for this one moment. Would he take me, after I've hurt him so much? Would he even open the door?

That question was answered as the front window suddenly became illuminated, and the door wrenched open. There, standing eight feet from me was Jake, his tall form filling the door frame. I felt my steps slow as I looked at him; his arms crossed almost defensively, his chin raised. I couldn't see his face in the shadow, but I imagined it matched his stance: cold and defensive. I stopped walking. This wasn't going to work, I thought. Seeing him possibly glaring at me, I knew it wouldn't work.

"What do you want, Bella?" he asked across the way, stepping onto his porch and shutting the door behind him. I bit my lip and forced my eyes away from him. Why was I doing this to him?

"I…I had to see you." I fumbled.

"Why? To rub more salt in my wounds?" he asked cynically. "Sorry Bella, but I'm not in the mood for that today." He turned to head back into his house. No! I can't let him walk away!

"I left him!" I called after him, my voice pathetically quiet. It was quiet, but Jake still heard it with his sensitive hearing, and his paused mid step. There was a millisecond of stillness before he whirled around and stared at me, an air of astonishment radiating across the way.

"What did you just say?" he asked while leaping off of the porch and slowly walking toward me.

"I left him." I repeated, no more than a whisper. All of the courage and determination I had had seemed to have disappeared as I spoke, draining me of any energy I had. Jake stopped right in front of me, bending to my level. I could see his face now. I could the look of hope and surprise in his eyes, but also wariness. He didn't fully believe me.

"Why?" he breathed. Why? What kind of question was that? He should know exactly why. Or, maybe he did. Maybe he did know, but he just didn't believe it. I felt a small, gentle smile spread on my face, before I placed my hand against his warm cheek. His eyes widened as he unconsciously leaned into my hand, his gaze not leaving mine.

With a smile on my face, I pulled myself closer to Jacob's, feeling his hot breath quicken.

"Because I love you." I whispered before pressing my lips to his. His warm lips ignited a spark deep within me, a pleasurable fire starting. He didn't respond for a moment, startled by this turn of events. I wrapped my left hand, now free of weighted tie to Edward, and tangled fingers into his hair, pulling him closer to me. Jacob took the hint and growled lowly, before wrapping his warm arms around me and crushing me to him.

This was right, I thought, wrapping both arms tightly around his neck. No matter how unfamiliar it was, it was right. This passionate pyre that engulfed my body was perfectly normal and right, nothing at all like the icy fire I had come to know. This was not a battle against nature, being with Jacob, not a contradiction, oxymoron, or a cruel ironic twist of fate. It was right, as natural as breathing.

I'm not exactly sure how long Jake and I stayed wrapped in our own fiery embrace, it could have been hour, days, or just a few milliseconds. Time seemed to disintegrate under the heat. But, all things have to end. I only wish it had ended more…gracefully.

Yet, me being me, we were interrupted in the most unromantic and ungraceful way possible.

My stomach unleashed a horrendous and almost animalistic growl of its own. I felt a raging blush flood my face. What a perfect time for my stomach to decide to make its presence known. Jacob pulled away from me, leaning his forehead against mine, and let out a breathless chuckle.

"When was the last time you ate?" he asked me. I blinked a few times. Good question. Umm…

"I honestly don't remember." I answered him. He chuckled once before pressing his lips to my forehead, grabbing my hand, and pulling me toward his house.

"Come on, Bella. It may not be as good as your lasagna, but I sure we have something in this house." he said, leading me up the door. I smiled and let him lead me, concentrating on the rough calloused hand that covered mine. The flames that flickered across my skin at his touch were a new experience. It was as if while living under Edward's shelter I was shielded from this extraordinary feeling. Now that I was free, I could feel this; notice how his touch actually affected me. I have to say…I loved it.

Jake quickly pulled me into the house, a light bounce in his step. I giggled softly at that. He was so happy, nothing like the Jacob whom had opened the door. Jake spun around quickly, hearing my giggle, and pinned me against the now closed door. In the light of the house, I could now clearly and undoubtedly see what was burning within Jacob's eyes. A warm tingle spread through my body as I stared at the pure love, adoration, and lust that were evident in his eyes.

He leaned in close. "And what is so funny, Ms. Swan?" he asked, his warm breath washing over my face. I smiled at him.

"Why you are of course, Mr. Black." His eyes darkened slightly and he leaned in closer, his eyes hooded. I felt one of my arms instinctively wrap itself around Jakes neck as he moved closer.

"Is that right?" he asked, his lips brushing lightly against mine. I shiver ran up my spine. I nodded minutely, causing his lips to brush mine again. A low rumble reverberated through his chest…at the same time that my stomach growled yet again. Jacob barked a laugh out. "Right, food." he remembers, pecking me on the lips quickly before continuing to the kitchen.

I settled myself at the table, a little peeved at my stomach. I mean, twice in a row? That would only happen to me, I thought as I watched Jake moved around the small kitchen. My anger dispersed slightly with every smile he flashed my way as he dug through the cabinets and fridge. I watched as he quickly pulled together some "masterpiece", hiding it from me as he worked. I had to laugh every time he would look over his shoulder conspiratorially, before hurrying back to his work.

He was so happy. That thought made my smile widen to the point where it almost hurt. He was so happy, his dark eyes were bright instead of heavy, his step was bouncy instead sluggish, his smile seemed to have brighten a tenfold since I had gotten here. He was so happy, and his happiness radiated throughout the air and only added to my own.

I had never, in my life, been surrounded by such joy.

"Hey," Jake's voice brought me out of the gleeful atmosphere. I blinked and found him kneeling in front of me, a plated sandwich sitting on the table. Jake's voice was wary and concerned, his hand on either side of my face. "What's wrong?" he asked me quietly. His thumb brushed something off of my cheek. It was then that I noticed that…I was crying. I shook my head at him and smiled.

"I'm just happy." I blinked, allowing a few more tears to escape. Jacob flashed his diamond smile at me, and wiped more tears away.

"I'm happy too, Bells. So, happy." he whispered, before kissing my forehead and nodding toward the sandwich. "Now, eat." he ordered, before taking a seat across from me. I picked up the sandwich anyway and took a bite.

"Very good, Jacob, you can make a sandwich." I praised him, making him laugh. Suddenly I had a vision, much like the one I had only a few weeks earlier. Jacob and I sitting at a table, much like we were now only the setting was different: the kitchen was larger, the table fitted for more people-two children to be exact- and dish of lasagna was sitting before us. Our own kitchen, in our own house, with our own family, in our own little world.

Everything I wanted and needed was in this vision, and it was beginning to form right in front of me.

* * *

**A/N: Chapter 3! :D You have no idea how hard it was to write this, while knowing EXACTLY how it ends...but, here it is! I'm actually pretty pleased! But, my opinion doesn't matter, it's YOURS that does! So...tell me what you think! Reviews are always loved and wanted, both the good and the bad! **


	4. Music

**A/N:…..I…..am…..horrible….I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A MILLION YEARS! :O I am so so so sorry! Life caught up, and…well fan fiction is really in the VERY back of my mind at the moment. I'm updating now, but I can't promise regular and fast updates. I'm sorry! **

**But I'm here for the moment so….Warning: I have 18 years to cover, so there will be some time skip-age going on. This chapter takes place two months **_**after **_**the breakup. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own NOTHING! Here that? Absolutely nothing!**

* * *

BPOV

I sighed as I slipped through the door to my dorm, my bag falling onto the floor with a dramatic thump. I had never been one to complain about school; it was just something that someone had to do if they wanted a future. I accepted that. I accepted getting up early, pushing through crowded hallways, enduring a loud cafeteria, and survived the homework with grace.

College sucks.

"That bad?" came Angela's voice as she walked out of the tiny kitchenette and into our living room. I just groaned in response and made my way to the couch. College is something entirely different. High school did _nothing _to prepare me for _this_. Angela sat next to me, folding her legs up underneath her. "It was only the first day, Bella."

"Yes, the ultimate first day. You forget, I know _nothing _about music!" I reminded her, glaring softly at my roommate. It was her fault I was here, majoring in something I had generally shied away from in the beginning. She rolled her eyes, unfazed at my glare, and shrugged.

"You love it." she stated, smiling at me. I sighed, silently wishing that Jessica had not forced us to do karaoke at her eighteenth birthday back in June.

_Angela and I were sitting cross legged on her bed, a whole pile of University of Washington information in front of us. I sighed and picked up a flyer. College was a touchy thing at the moment. I didn't want to go right away, it would be so much better if I could wait a year and then just go with Jake. But…no one quite agreed with that. _

_Charlie had lectured me about how if I were to put it off now, I would keep putting it off until it was too late. Angela had said that she would support whatever I decided to do, but didn't hesitate to lay down a few statistics before me. Even Jake had joked about it, saying that he had always wanted to tell everyone he was dating a college girl. So now I was here, looking through U of W stuff with Angela, while waiting for the confirmation of my late acceptance to come in. _

"_You want to teach?" Angela asked me for confirmation. I nodded curtly, still slightly peeved at the whole thing. I don't know what drew me to the career, but…for some reason I could see myself as a teacher. "Okay…well what subject?"_

_That was the thing…I didn't know. _

"_History?" she asked. _I was the youngest major in Texas, _Jaspers voice immediately filled my thoughts. History…if I were to go anywhere near that subject, who knew how many times I would slip up. I shook my head. _

"_We both know you hate math, so that's out." she continued, scanning the list before her. "English? You were always so good at it." _It isn't a love story, it's a hate story, _Edwards melodic voice came to mind. I immediately shook my head, knowing that this subject would be too sore to even consider pursuing. _

_Angela pursed her lips. "Science?" she asked, doubt coloring her tone. _He was healing at an incredible rate, though his injuries were extensive enough that it will be a few days before he is back to normal, _Carlisle's reassuring tone entered my memory. Science would just remind me of him, his love of knowledge, science, and medicine. _

"_I don't think that's for me." I said, right as Angela's alarm started going off. She quickly reached for her phone and disabled the alarm, before sighing and pulling herself off the bed. _

"_We'll think of something, but for now…" a small smile spread on her face. "You and I have to get to Jessica's party." I groaned. Yes, I was happy that Jessica and I had been able to mend our friendship enough to where she would invite me to her eighteenth birthday party, but…I was selfish enough to want to spend time with Jake rather than her and Lauren. "I've spoken with Jake, and he says for you to go." Angela continued, triumphant that she had though through everything. _

"_When did you talk to Jake?" I asked her, shocked not only because she had managed to do this without me knowing, but also because he actually agreed with her! _

"_While you were in the bathroom earlier." she said, before grabbing my hand and pulling me up. "Come on, it'll be fun!" _

…

_Fun. Since when was karaoke considered fun? Jessica had dragged us and the rest of her large group of friends to a karaoke bar in Port Angeles, and we have had to listen to eleven people sing off key. In the time we have been here, the bar had begun emptying with one man actually booing Mike while he was on stage. Jessica didn't seem to notice though, I thought looking over at her, clapping excitedly as Lauren sauntered off the stage. As Lauren sat down, an air of haughtiness surrounding her, Jessica looked around her, before jumping and turning to me. _

"_You have to go Bella!" My eyes widened as I stared at Jessica. _

"_Umm, no that's okay." I said, shaking my head and taking a sip of my soda. I was not going to get up and make a fool of myself singing karaoke. Jessica pouted. _

"_For my birthday! Please Bella!" she begged me, clutching onto my arm. I made eye contact with Angela-who had been forced to go earlier-wondering what I should do. She shrugged and nodded toward the stage. Sighing, I nodded my head and pried Jess off of my arm and made my way onto the stage. I quickly looked at the list the DJ had, and chose the only song I knew well enough to sing to, grabbed the microphone, and patiently waited for him to play the CD, ignoring the sounds of Mike, Tyler, and Eric cat calling._

_I hear the ticking of the clock_

_I'm lying here the room's pitch dark_

_I wonder where you are tonight_

_No answer on the telephone_

_And the night goes by so very slow_

_Oh I hope that it won't end though_

_Alone_

_Till now I always got by on my own_

_I never really cared until I met you_

_And now it chills me to the bone_

_How do I get you alone_

_How do I get you alone_

_You don't know how long I have wanted_

_to touch your lips and hold you tight, oh_

_You don't know how long I have waited_

_and I was going to tell you tonight_

_But the secret is still my own_

_and my love for you is still unknown_

_Alone_

_Till now I always got by on my own_

_I never really cared until I met you_

_And now it chills me to the bone_

_How do I get you alone_

_How do I get you alone_

_How do I get you alone_

_How do I get you alone_

_Alone, alone_

_I'm pretty sure I looked like a tomato as the music faded and I shakily placed the microphone back on the stand. I am not meant to go on stage and perform for anyone, and the silence that befell the bar proved that. I ducked my head and almost ran off stage, trying to avoid tripping. No one said anything to me as I quickly made my way out of the bar and outside. _

_Yeah, so that hadn't been the best idea in the world. I should never have given into Jessica's begging and gotten up and made a fool of myself. I heard the door open and shut, but I didn't turn to see who was exiting behind me. I took a deep breath, trying to get rid of the overwhelming embarrassment that was wracking through my system. _

"_Bella?" came Angela's voice. I opened my eyes and looked at my friend, hoping that she wasn't about to laugh at me. Instead, I saw something like awe in her face and a wide smile spreading. "I think we have found a subject for you."_

Oh, if it hadn't been for that night, I would probably be a little happier in college. I wouldn't be taking a class I knew nothing about, and I certainly wouldn't be in in a class where the professor has already expressed her down right _hatred_ of me. But Angela had to beg,, and plead, and point out that there was nowhere else I could go, and she insisted that I was a good singer. Now…here we are.

"Well, if it makes you feel better, Jake called while you were out." Angela said. I raised my eyebrows and immediately grabbed for my phone. Hmm…three missed calls… "He wanted to know if you were busy tonight…I said no….so, he's going to pick you up at seven." I smiled at my best friend before getting up.

"That gives me five hours to take a nap, unwind, get ready, and then see Jake." I informed, before dragging myself over to my side of the dorm and plopping on the bed. I heard Angela laugh at me.

"Well, Ben just got out of class as well, so we're going out for lunch." she informed before we said goodbye and she was out the door, leaving me to my thoughts.

College had been a bad idea, I knew it from the very beginning. It was too soon after altering my entire life to be sitting in a class full of people who knew for certain where they wanted to go in life. And I was two hours from Jake. I never noticed, while I was with Edward, that two hours away from Jacob would effect me so much. But it did. I found myself slipping into past habits, almost forgetting who it was I loved anymore. I would find myself opening the window before going to bed, before catching myself and closing it with more force than necessary.

But that was natural right?

I mean it's just like the saying 'old habits die hard'. I am the living proof of that, and that's okay. I know that I love Jacob with all of my heart, I know that I can and will be happy with him in my life.

But…being in that music room, in a place where I felt more connected with Edward than I have even been in the past two months… I probably could've been happy with him. If I hadn't been so intolerable about things…if Charlie hadn't even brought up another option… I could've been happy. Maybe not as happy as I am with Jake, but happy enough without hurting Edward.

I found myself leaning over the edge of my bed, and reaching under it, my hand blindly groping for the shoe box I had stowed under it. My fingers tightly grasped at the lid of the box, and I carefully pulled it out, switching into a sitting position. I cradled the black shoe box reverently in my lap, before lifting the lid off.

There was only one thing sitting in the box, pillowed in a blanket of tissues I had carefully folded for it's protection. The timeless ring that had once called my finger home, was now nestled in the middle of the box, its diamonds shining up at me with a sad smile. I wanted to return his mothers ring to him, but…I couldn't part with it. I don't know why I couldn't, some unseen force refused to allow me to part with the ring. So, instead, I made sure it was safe in this shoe box.

I didn't regret my decision. I loved Jacob and I was looking forward to many years with him, but…sometimes I wondered if the reason I couldn't part with the beautiful piece of jewelry was because…I wasn't meant to.

But that was just a silly thought, I realized, shaking my head and hiding the ring from sight again.

* * *

**A/N: I know…I know…it's disjointed and badly written…but…five pages! After three months of writers block…that's pretty intense! Anywhoo, the song is Alone-Heart, and…I really hope I get some reviews (though I know I don't deserve them)**


	5. Warehouse Dates

**A/N: Guess who's back! :D Okay, it's short, but...I felt like you guys should get just a LITTLE more before I get pulled into a time warp again and NOT have time to write anymore. Anywhoo...here it is :D And to TwilightRJGmomma, yes I do read fanfics as well whenever I have time (it would let me reply to you for some reason :P)**

**Disclaimer: I own...just about...NOTHING!**

* * *

BPOV

"Jake, where are we going!" I asked for the millionth time as he continued to pull me through the streets of Seattle. He laughed as my tone took on a whiny characteristic.

"Can't I take my beautiful, wonderful, college girlfriend for an aimless walk around Seattle with really no where to go?" he asked, squeezing my hand and throwing a wide smile at me. I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"You can. But you're not." I knew Jake, and I knew when he had something planned. Jacob had taken me out on a perfect date which involved dinner in a tiny quaint diner, a movie-of his choice seeing as I have lost all right to pick movies because of that one time with him and Mike-and now we were wandering seemingly aimless around Seattle. He laughed at me, and pulled me around another corner.

"We're almost there." he assured me, excitement coloring his voice. I smiled and sped up slightly to where I was trotting beside Jacob rather than being dragged behind him. He was correct with his statement, he came to a stop in front of a building just a few moments later. He turned to me and flashed his brilliant smile, before capturing my lips with his.

Kissing Jake…is an experience that I loved so much. Fire completely and entirely engulfed my being, from the crown of my head down to the very tips of my toes. It was a flame that I had begun craving ever since the first spark. So, naturally, I pouted when Jake pulled away from me. He smiled and then turned toward the building, spreading his arms wide.

"TA-DA!" He exclaimed. I raised my eyebrows and looked at the building.

It was an old abandon warehouse. The windows were boarded up, the walls vandalized with graffiti, the overhead door was somehow padlocked to the ground. I could feel the confusion flood my face. What was so spectacular about a run down abandon warehouse?

"Umm, it's….nice?" I offered, hoping I'd said the right thing. Jake rolled his eyes, and shook his head, before digging in his pocket. He headed over to the locked door, knelt down, and then deftly unlocked the door before pushing it up over his head. He threw me a reassuring smile before walking inside. I followed after him.

Inside wasn't any better than the exterior. The air was musty, dust circling around us. Tools were left scattered around the place, with random parts strewn along the floor. I looked at Jacob, knowing that he tended to find beauty in things that only looked like junk to me. I wasn't disappointed to see him gazing around the little warehouse with a broad smile on his face. He looked…proud. Like he was a new father. He caught my eye and sighed.

"You still haven't gotten it?" he asked.

"Enlighten me, oh wise one, what is there to get?" I asked him. He smiled at me patiently, as if I were a child, and walked over to me. He placed his hands on my shoulders, and slowly turned me around, making me take a three hundred and sixty degree look of the warehouse.

"What if…" Jacob started as he continued turning me. "I didn't go to college?"

"What?" I exclaimed. He made a big deal about me going to college, and now he's talking about not even trying to go!

"Let me explain." he said, his tone soothing in my ear. "What if, this warehouse…this garage….was mine?" I stiffened in his arms, staring at the open door with wide eyes. His garage? I always knew that Jacob was talented enough to have his own garage, he built his rabbit in the span of only a few months! But…was I to support him not getting a college education because of his talent? I turned in Jake's arms and looked at him.

He looked worried, scared of my reaction. But…deep in his dark eyes I could see excitement, confidence, and a fierce determination that made me smile. He knew what he wanted, but he wanted to run it by me first. I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"You really want to do this?" I asked him. The excitement brightened his eyes as he nodded. "Then…I guess I think it's a great idea."

"Really?" he asked. I smiled and quickly pecked his lips.

"Of course. But…first tell me exactly how you found this place?" He laughed and pulled me close.

"Embry's uncle owns the property." My eyebrows raised. I didn't know that. "Being Embry's best friend has it's perks. And it helps the fact that Embry and Quil both plan on running it with me." I laughed, that would help. "It'll need a good cleaning before we actually get started on things."

"And this is where I come in, right?" I asked raising my eyebrows. I had been to Jakes house…I knew how he cleaned. And I knew his brothers of sorts were no better than he was. He had the decency to look sheepish, but he shrugged.

"It would help." I rolled my eyes and smirked at him.

"You're going to have to earn it." I said, running my fingers through his growing hair. His eyes darkened and a low growl began building in his chest. His hands gripped my hips tightly.

"And how may I do that?"

"I can think of a few things." I murmured, my lips brushing softly against his. He groaned lowly when I pulled back enough to separate our lips, and smirked at him. "You can start by taking me home, curfew is in thirty minutes." Yes, he did not look very happy at me, but…I don't make the rules. Freshman have to be in their dorms by eleven, or else we will get in trouble.

Jacob glared at me for a moment, before sighing and nodded, mumbling something along the lines of "such a tease". He moved to step away from me, but before he could get far, I quickly wrapped my arms around his neck tighter and smashed my lips to his. And in the middle of the garage, that would soon become Jacob's workshop, I kissed my love. And I couldn't have been happier.

* * *

**A/N: It's short and the ending sucks but... :) Reviews are still loved!**


	6. Progression?

BPOV

The months passed in a blur. With the exception of my classes, I would spend my time working in a small local bookstore, cleaning the warehouse that was slowly but surely turning into Jake's own paradise, and juggling homework and our relationship. I always went to bed exhausted, but feeling extremely proud of myself.

Now, a week before Christmas break, I walked from the bookstore toward Jake's second home. He was truly and utterly devoted into his garage, spending more time in there than he did at home. Billy often complained about he sometimes forgot what he looked like, he was gone so often-either for school, the garage, or with me. But when seeing what he, Quil, and Embry were able to accomplish in only a few short months, no one could hide their awe.

The grungy, vandalized, trashed warehouse was now full of light with zero cobwebs, a clean floor, and new paint. The graffiti had been covered, the overhead door replaced, and I knew that the garage was only a few signatures away from being open for business. Embry's uncle had taken over all of the paper work for the garage, so Jake and his seventeen year old self didn't have to worry about loans and lawyers.

I skipped over a river of slush that was flowing along the sidewalk, and hurried through the open door, into the warmth. Though Seattle had become considerably colder within the past few weeks, Jake still left the door open, but kept the heat up for me. Not very energy efficient, but…considerate. The warmth enveloped over me, as I slipped out of my parka and carefully hung it on a nail by the door, shutting the door behind me.

"Jake!" I called, making my way around his Rabbit that was parked cozily in the garage. I smiled at the sight. Soon more cars would file in beside it, the garage will be packed…

"Back here, honey!" he answered from the back office. I could see through the tiny office window that he was bent over some papers on the desk, a look of deep concentration on his face. I smiled at the sight. He was so ready for this place to be up and running.

"What are you doing?" I wondered, leaning against the doorway. The office was so small, especially with a desk and Jake's overgrown body in it, that if I tried to get in, I would all but be in Jake's lap. Normally this wouldn't matter….but he was working. He threw me a quick smile before looking back at the documents.

"Ordering some new stuff. Embry, Quil, and I can donate only so many things…and most of them are rusty." I rolled my eyes. Jake took care of his tools, each month he spent an entire day shining and oiling them. He circled one last thing, almost throwing the pen down, before stretching his long arms to me. I giggled as he grabbed my waist and pulled me into the room, and into his lap.

"Much better." He growled lowly, pressing a kiss into my neck. I had to agree. Being away from Jacob was like splitting myself down the middle and leaving one half at home. Now that we were together, I was whole again. Whole….warm….protected…and loved. What more could I ask for? "How was your day, baby?" he asked me.

"Pretty good. Yours?" I didn't even have to ask. I knew he had been up here all day, going through papers, ordering tools, trying to finalize things with Embry's uncle and the insurance company. He groaned in response and nuzzled my neck. I ran my fingers through his long hair, trying to make him relax. For a sixteen-year-old, he was working himself too hard.

"Better now that you're here." He said, pressing his lips into the hollow of my throat. I smiled, grabbed his chin, and pulled his face level with mine.

"I could say the same thing." I responded, before pressing my lips to his. Thus, I received the very thing I had been subconsciously craving ever since Jake and I parted after lunch…the passionate fire that always engulfed me when our lips met. I do not know what is so…addicting about it, but I always found that I could not get enough of it. I wove my finger through his hair and pulled myself closer to him, relishing in the feeling of his warm mouth moving with mine.

He groaned into me, before shifting me to where I was straddling his lap, his hands gripping my hips. I smiled into the kiss as he pulled me impossibly tighter against him. One thing I loved about being with Jake was that I didn't have to be afraid to initiate or get into a kiss. I didn't have to worry about limited time before my safety became an issue, I didn't have to sit through a lecture afterward…because he never pulled away. He was always as into it as I was.

Jakes hands slowly shifted up from my hips and began playing with the hem of my shirt for a moment. I giggled breathlessly as the loose fabric tickled my skin. He took that as a sign of encouragement and I felt his burning hands slide against the skin of my lower back. Sharp volts of electricity shot through me as his hands danced along my back, his mouth more urgent against mine. My short breaths were intermingled with his to point where I couldn't distinguish the two. Was I even breathing? Or was he supplying my air? Stealing my air? My head spun from a combination of lack of oxygen and the bolts of lighting that shocked my being.

But it all stopped when I felt his warm fingers begin to fondle with the clasp of my bra.

"Stop." I gasped out, pulling away from Jacob almost violently, falling completely out of his lap and onto the floor, hitting my head against the wall. There was a beat of silence, well…not silence. The office was filled with our gasping breaths, my heart beat was pounding so hard he _had_ to be able to hear it. I sat there, my head throbbing painfully, trying to control my breathing, when I heard the door open.

"Jake, you in here, man?" Embry called, from the door. I quickly made my way to a standing position, avoiding Jakes eyes. "Oh hey Bella!" Embry greeted me from outside the office door (he wouldn't have a chance of fitting with both me and Jake here).

"Hey Embry." I muttered. "Umm, I'm going to head out." I continued, shuffling my way out the door.

"Wait, Bella, let me give you a ride." Jake offered, starting to get up from the desk, but I shook my head. I couldn't handle the conversation he was bound to bring…not now.

"It's a nice night, and not that far to walk. I'll call you later." And with that, I rushed from view, grabbed my parka from the nail quickly and stepped out into the night. I know I shouldn't hide from this conversation, but…I wasn't able to talk to Jake about _that_ just yet.

_Why? You had no trouble expressing your views to Edward?_ A part of me mentioned. _In fact…you know that you wouldn't have stopped him if he wanted to take off your bra. _

Edward is different from Jacob. I argued with myself as made my way through the dark Seattle jungle.

_How? _

With Edward I was afraid of time. I was afraid that he would disappear every time I blinked. I was afraid that we would never get the chance….so I pushed it. But with Jacob I know he'll be there for me. I know he'll wait, and I know that he won't suddenly turn into a puff of smoke. And since we have that time…there's no need to rush.

_Then why did it bother you so much? _

…I don't know. I don't know why it bothered me.

_Having doubts? You made your choice….but you chose wrong?_

No. I know I made the right choice. I loved Edward, but I love Jacob now. I am with Jacob and I couldn't be happier with him. So what if I don't want to go that far with him just yet? That doesn't mean anything. That doesn't change the fact that I want to spend my life with Jacob. We will progress physically at some point…but not now. And there's nothing wrong with that. And Edward has nothing to do with my relationship with Jake.

_Whatever helps you sleep at night…_****

* * *

**A/N: I'm a horrible horrible person, yes? GAH! but i'm here now. Reviews are loved and welcomed, both good and bad, and they actually do make me type faster (got 0 reviews for ch5...) :DD**


	7. Fiery Blizzards

**A/N: BACK! :DD **

**Disclaimer: I do not own ANYTHING! **

* * *

BPOV

I want to say that things went back to normal. I want to say that I sat Jake down and we talked it out. I explained to him why I left so hurriedly, why I told him to stop, why I panicked. And we discussed it all. I want to say that Jacob and I were on a firmer foundation now…but I can't.

Because I have been almost avoiding him these two weeks. It became harder once Christmas break started. I had moved back to Forks for the holiday, so I had to quit my job at the bookstore temporarily and had no lessons to attend to. All I had to do in Forks to keep my mind _off _of my seemingly failing relationship with Jacob was cooking, cleaning, and Christmas shopping. So I had virtually limitless time on my hands.

Up until a few days ago, Jake would call me almost constantly. He would call me in the morning, at noon, at dinner, and late at night before I had gone to bed. I never answered, afraid of the confrontation, not ready to explain to him what was going on. But his messages always got to me.

'_Hey Bella…it's me again. Look, I'm sorry for pushing you. I'm sorry for not asking. I just got caught up in the heat of the moment and…Just call me back. I love you…'_

'_It's me again…God, this must have been how you felt when I never answered your calls…Just please talk to me Bells! Tell me what I did wrong and how I can fix it! I…need you…I can't stand this…'_

'_Okay… you need time, I get that. I'll let you have your time, time to think about whatever it is that goes on in the mind of Bella. Just…come back to me. Whenever your done thinking…I'll still be here. Probably still waiting by phone…Love you.'_

He was blaming himself. He was blaming himself and still held faith for me. I didn't deserve it. I didn't deserve him. I never deserved him, not as a friend and not as a lover. But he was willing to give himself to me, wholly and completely.

I had had a lot of time to think, seeing as laundry doesn't necessarily do much to take your mind off of things, time to push my doubts to the back of my mind and to think and relish in what I have. I have Jacob. I have the boy who stood by me when no one else would. I have the man who was strong enough to fight for what he wanted. I have the man who loved me even though it hurt him.

And I was cruel enough to deny him. Deny him because some subconscious part of me was still living in the past. Not anymore. I have the present I want, with Jacob and Charlie and Renee. I have the future I long for, with Jacob and Charlie and Renee and maybe a few little children. There was no point in living in the past anymore.

It was Christmas Eve here in Forks, my first Christmas where I was lucid enough to actually celebrate. The house was adorned in dusty garland and lights, with a giant Christmas tree sitting the living room. There were already some present under the tree, small boxes and bags. I smiled at the sight. Charlie didn't seem like one who enjoyed Christmas, but maybe he was just going out of his way to make it special for me.

The phone rang, swaying me from my Christmas thoughts. Jacob, I knew automatically as I made my way to it. There was no point in not answering.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Bella!" Jacob sighed in relief. "Hey how are you?" He asked, scrambling for something to say, not expecting me to actually answer.

"I'm…good. I was actually about to call you." Maybe not about to, but I knew that a conversation with him could no longer be avoided. Might as well go ahead and get it out of the way. "I was thinking about heading down to the beach… you wanna join me?" I invited. The beach was our place: that little strip by the water, with our makeshift driftwood bench that never changed. It didn't matter that it was cold and snowing, the beach would always be the perfect place for two souls to meet.

I could almost hear the smile in Jacobs voice. "Sure, I'll meet you there." He exclaimed before hanging up in his excitement. I sighed. I have once again managed to hurt the only constant good thing in my life. I'm kind of waiting for the day when Jacob wakes up and realizes that he can do better than me. Maybe he'll imprint…he'll find someone who would treat him the way he needed to be treated.

I vowed to myself right then that I would treat him well from now on. I would talk to him about whatever it was that was bothering me rather than running from him. I would make him happy to be with me, not hurt him anymore.

* * *

Maybe it wasn't the best idea to come to the beach on Christmas Eve. All through Forks and La Push was a thick ever growing blanket of snow. It was so thick, in fact, that my trusty old truck…stopped. I was stranded at the edge of La Push, in the middle of a snowstorm.

I had only limited options.

I knew that I had be at least a little over the treaty line, so I was maybe a ten minute walk from Jacobs house…which, taking in my clumsiness and the cold, means that I'm really thirty minutes away. I'd freeze before I got there. I could open my door and start calling for Jacob, he would hear me with his supersensitive hearing…but I as feel like an idiot. Or, I could sit here, in my warm truck and pray that someone will find me.

While the latter seemed like a perfect idea…I knew that the truck would die all together if I kept it running. I looked out into the white storm, apprehensively. I was only wearing a sweater and a small jacket, no gloves, ear muffs, hat…I'd be a Bella popsicle the second I stepped out. But I knew I couldn't just sit here. So… took a deep breath, relishing in the warm air for the last time, and forced the rusty door open.

I gasped as a rush of frosty air hit me with an unbelievable force. Bad idea. I knew it was bad idea, but…I stepped out of the warm cab. I gingerly grounded my feet, refusing to allow myself to fall as I shut the door. Wrapping my arms around me, trying to conserve whatever body heat I had, I began my trek through the cold white abyss, hoping that Jacobs house was closer than I thought.

I don't know how long I was walking, the wind cutting through my outer layers like sharp icicles. It seemed years ago that my truck disappeared behind me, leaving me all alone in the blinding white. That's all there was. White, everywhere. There was no telling if I was any closer to my destination, all landmarks were lost in the white. I could be going in circles for all I knew, forever stranded in the freezing white. Sometime during my trek the tiny trembles that wracked through my body turned into severe seizures. I could no longer feel my extremities, my eyes were burning from strain and the wind.

I've never been this frozen before. The only other time I was in a snow storm, I was shielded by a tent and had my own space heater to keep me warm. God, I'd give all my toes up for Jacob to be here!

I was fighting storm, praying that I was almost there…when my foot slipped on a concealed piece of ice. I was falling for maybe one second, but in the one second, I knew that the moment I hit the ground, I was doomed. I knew that the snow would engulf me, the cold would be too much and I wouldn't be able to get back up.

But I never hit the ground. I wasn't suddenly surrounded by wet cold snow. Instead, I was caught in a pair of burning arms, and immediately hoisted against his bare chest. I wanted to cry in relief as I breathed in Jacob's scent, his heat washing over me, already melting the popsicle that was me. He didn't say anything, probably more intent on getting out of the storm than yelling at me. I clutched myself tighter to him as he began running, pulling myself more into his warmth.

It was unbelievable how quickly he got to his house, either I was close or he was just really fast. He entered the house briskly, a whole new wave of warmth hitting me, and immediately carried me to the back, to his room. Jacob gingerly but quickly laid me on his bed, before his unzipped my jacket and pulled the wet thing off of me, only to reveal my equally soaked sweater.

"Bells...you won't get warm with that on…" he tried to explain to me quietly. I barely heard him, the sound of my chattering teeth drowning out his voice. There was a beat of silence before I felt his burning fingers brush against the bare skin of my stomach. I felt his flaming hands peel the soaking wet sweater off of my body, which seemed to only make me colder. The moment I was liberated from the sweater, Jacob pulled me to his chest, wrapping his arms around me, and even going as far as to hitch his leg over my hip.

And even then, with my bra clad chest against his complete bare chest, I was still frozen. Even though Jakes burning self was completely wrapped around me, I was still shivering violently.

Jake growled lowly in his chest, before pulling my face up to his, pressing his lips firmly against mine. His lips were a sweet relief against my icy ones. I could feel myself warming up under them, his warm lips melting mine, his hot breath warming me up from the inside out. I managed to pull my arms from between us and wrapped them around his neck, pulling him closer to me, trying to gather as much heat from his lips as possible.

He rolled us over, pressing his overheated body against me, breaking the kiss only to let me breath, moving to warm up my neck. The temperature of the room was rising around us quickly. Jacob pressed his lips against mine again. This was more than just saving me from freezing, this was a reunion. I haven't kissed Jacob in two weeks, I've barely seen him in that time. I haven't felt his warm body against mine, haven't felt his fiery fingers entangle in my hair, I haven't felt him in so long.

I wrapped my legs around his waist, allowing him to settle in closer to me.

"Your jeans are wet." he murmured against my lips. I smiled.

"I won't get warm." Jacob pulled away and looked at me. I could see disbelief and excitement in his eyes. "I'm just saying….Survival 101 right?" He smiled, exultant, before pulling me in for another scorching kiss. I smiled as the passionate flames grew around us. This was right. Me and Jake locked in our own fiery embrace…this was right. This was where I wanted to be.

* * *

**A/N: Hey guys! I have a proposition for you guys. Since UIL One Act Play has started, I have ZERO free time. So I can't just sit down and think "i'm bored, I'm going to write". BUT! I do have time to BRIBE you guys! :D If I get 10 reviews, I will update THIS week (Tues. Wed. Thurs. or Fri.) if I don't...you'll most likely have to wait until Sunday or later. Just saying, if you wanna hear what happens next...press the button! :DD**


End file.
